Failed police recruits put on the beat

February 21, 2007

Here’s another story – apparently new recruits are being allowed out of Police College before they have passed all their exams. I think it’s a good thing. We have politicans who have no qualifications at all and are running the country (no wonder it’s in this state you say), city councillors who do nothing but bicker and try and get re-elected rather than actually doing good things for the city, road workers who stand around all day leaning on their shovels and get paid a lot more money than me and people in the IT industry getting over $100K for doing stuff all. Bring back pay parity I say. The Police have a terrible job dealing with the scum (and I don’t just mean criminals) and so what if they don’t pass their driving exams. No really! I know lots of people who didn’t pass exams and they are working. What’s the difference. Stop picking on the police!

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Beauties and the Beasts

February 20, 2007

oriental1.jpg

Here we have a beautifil day at Oriental Bay. The temperature is into the 20’s. On the beach is strew an incredible collection of young women most laying in skimmy bikinis sun baking. On the footpath are a row of seats usually occupied by men young and old.

Here’s my suggestion as to rules for the beach.

Men:
1. Wear dark glasses so no one can see who you are staring at.
2. Pretend to talk on your cellphone and smile alot so people don’t think you are mentally undressing the woman lying directly below you.
3. Remove you work clothing and put on shorts and a short sleeved shirt and the sunnies in case you look like you are in your lunch break.
4. Don’t sit with your hands between your legs because it’s too obvious what you are trying to supress.
5. Wipe tears from your eyes subtly because you know you will never ‘tap’ the type of woman lying on the beach again, at your age.

Women:
1. Wear the skimmest bikini you can find and as you lie there continually smooth it down, tug in the edges revealing as much skin as you can, never mind the damage the sun is doing to your skin.
2. Occasionally pull your cellphone from your bag, check it and throw it back in, just in case someone is watching. You know if you adjust the text notification volume the phone will let you know when you have a message.
3. Stop looking at other women on the beach wishing you had their features. You drop-dead gorgous now.
4. When you sit or stand up don’t suddenly hold a shirt over your bare stomach because everyone has already seen a good deal of your body lying down and it’s too late to be shy now.
5. If you go swimming remember that those expensive white bikinis usually become see-through when they get wet so you will return to your spot on the beach showing off moe than you thought.

and pleaseeeeeee

6. Go up to the men on the seawall and throw yourself at them so they can worship you as they think fit.


Wellington Inner City Bypass

February 19, 2007

Had I had this blog setup a few months ago I could have complained about how much crap the wellington inner city bypass is. The Dominion Post reported some weeks ago that from a survey of residents the results have been that this 40 million dollar bypass saves between 1 to 2 minutes off people’ s journeys. What a saving! And as many people will be aware coming from the west side of wellington its now impossible to get across the city the other way without going miles out of your way. Who were the people who cooked up this plan. For those who haven’t seen this complete waste of money here is a photo I found on the net.

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Hey let’s save another minute and put in green bus lanes. Oh hang on – we already did that and no one saved any time!


Three Naenae children stabbed

February 18, 2007

Here’s another story. A man was arrested in Naenae early yesterday after a call was placed to Police from a distressed woman claiming a man was in her house threatening her 3 preschool children. When Police arrived the 3 were found with knife wounds. The offender will appear in Lower District Court this morning, Feb 19th.

This is just disgusting. Who the hell would stab 3 young children. This arsehole needs to be strung up by his balls and publicly stoned by the community. I hope the Police gave him a jolly good beating.

What’s the bet the low-life will be out on bail, probably try and shot a Policeman then get shot in a Police cordon before finally being put in jail, only to escape, be recaptured, be released, kill more people and then finally get put away for a pathetic life sentence of 10 years. Come on people – the American’s have some things right – life means the whole life – not only 6-10 years.

Update: It appears the suspect was tasered by the Police so he got his just desserts but unfortunatelty survived.